This is a general FAQ. If you have a more specific question, then please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Why Do You Write?
I originally started writing because it was faster to write a story than to draw it— think comics. I write to explore my internal creative world. I write to take my memories apart. Some of my experiences are traumatic to me even though other people have experienced worse, some people have not. I aim to help others work through similar experiences. I use writing to help me think through memories that I can't let go of and believe me— I've tried. Writing has become essentially a coping mechanism. I write because I believe that there is a better way to live, to think, and to be. Even in my fantastical stories, there will always be an element of realism and of my personal beliefs. I try not to spell anything out, but it leaks out from time to time.
Why Do You Write About Your
Do You Want Any of Them Back?
I'll answer the second question first— No, not in seven hells do I want any of them back. They were too mean and as I said before, the experience was traumatic for me. I don't like mean people. I avoid them like the plague. I can bounce back easily enough, but feelings remain.
I write about them as I find many of the experiences traumatic. Personally, if I could, I would've taken my heart out and put it in a box until I found a person who shared the same feelings that I was attracted to— both are important to me. I'm thinking of Pirates of the Caribbean while writing this. To make my point perfectly clear— I do not have total control over my feelings. I have total control over my actions. I cannot control how I feel. Anyone who says otherwise is discounting your feelings and is probably gaslighting you.
Many times I have felt strongly, I kept my mouth shut. I generally only tell a person once how I feel. I made the mistake of telling one person more than once because he was obtusely confusing. With my fiancé, I only told him how I felt after we moved in together because I was so afraid he would leave me after I told him how I feel. Obviously actions speak louder than words, but I refused to say the words for about four or five months. Granted, I was 28 when we moved in together and I was already living on my own. He was there often enough that it was stupid to not live together.
Ultimately, I hope that it helps someone out there who has the same issues that I do. I didn't gain much of anything from those experiences— just a lesson to not repeat them again. I don't look to the past for help with my future. Maybe the timing just wasn't right for some of them, but it does not give anyone the right to treat me like they did. I have to take care of myself and it is harmful to be near any of them. I don't wish them harm, but I definitely don't wish them well.
How Did you Learn to Draw?
You're so Talented!
To make this clear: Drawing is a skill.
Just like any skill— it requires practice. It requires you to break down the segments of learning to draw and then continually practice. I am not perfect, but I get better every time I draw. I've been drawing since I was 3 and I am now 31. That is a skill that I've been developing for 28 years. My writing skill only has about 16 years of developing time, but I've had a head start in that as well as I speak English. People said I had talent since I was a child. Talent is a meaningless word. I was not naturally born with the ability to draw. I was born with the love of drawing, coloring, and creating. You can start at any age as drawing skills include more than just the ability to draw. It is the ability to see and understand what you are seeing. If you want to draw people— use references and learn anatomy. Male anatomy and female anatomy are not the same. I had a difficult time drawing women as I drew guys all the time (Sesshomaru, Hiei, Sephiroth— to name a few of my favorite characters that I liked to draw). My women might as well have been cross-dressers as they didn't look like women. I had to learn how to draw women separately.
Steps to Learn to Draw
1. Trace to learn how to make a pencil line and learn muscle memory— this will help immensely
2. Copy without tracing— this is an essential step to draw from your mind (I can draw whatever I can imagine from doing this); includes drawing fruit bowls, drawing from life
3. Learn Value— Recognize it, Use it, Admit when you are wrong
4. Learn Color Theory— This is probably the think that makes or breaks many artists— Learn it well
5. Learn Perspective (There are other individual skills, but these are the essentials)
6. Draw Everything and PRACTICE!
How Do You Draw Digitally?
I Don't Want to Draw in Pencil.
Drawing digitally and drawing in pencil requires the same amount of work. You can't just learn one and not the other. They require the same fundamentals (read above).
^ That said— drawing digitally requires trying to find the right tools that will work for you.
I cannot draw on the Cintiq or on a Wacom tablet. I draw like an animator, so I continually pull the line towards me instead of pushing it away. On a regular Wacom tablet— I have to look at the screen to draw and it is so awkward. The angle is ALWAYS off and I just don't like it. On the Cintiq it has a screen, but it is impossible and awkward to rotate. I want to pick it up and turn it around. My Cintiq does not work like that. The cord is evil, so it has to stay where it is. There are buttons to rotate it, but I haven't found them to be not awkward.
So I usually will draw in pencil first then scan it in and import it to Photoshop. Using the Cintiq or a Wacom is great for regular painting. If I really want to get fancy, I can use the pen tool in Illustrator or Photoshop and that will solve my drawing issue. I just prefer to draw traditionally.
That said, there are people who can paint or draw with a mouse in Microsoft Paint, so there are options.
The best tool I have found to draw traditionally like I want to is ACTUALLY an iPad with the Apple Pencil 2 (I haven't use the Apple Pencil 1). It rotates easily and I feel like I have a drawing board— specifically, with my Sketchboard Pro from Braintreehouse.
You really have to figure out what works for you. I can just tell you what works for me.
Are You Democrat or Republican?
I've been asked this more than I can count.
The short answer: I am neither. I tend to lean towards Libertarian. On the test I took that said Democrat or Republican, I leaned one question more towards Republican.
The long answer: I believe in what works. When a presidential election comes up, I write down the top 3 things I care about over the next 4 years.
In the past 4 elections, my number one concern was the following:
In 2018, it was college. In 2022, it was still college. In 2016, it was the economy. In 2020, it was the stupid pandemic.
I voted according what was important to me at the time. I expect others to vote what they care about and not get too caught up in party choice.
The last four elections, I have made the same choice of who came into power.
That said, I don't like talking about politics. Most of my extended family is Republican. My close sister is very Democratic. She's a little on the extreme side. This same sister calls me a Centrist. Personally, I don't like our current system. It is a Representative Democracy. We vote for other people to represent us. I think I am more than capable to vote for myself. The Representative Democracy was put into place because at the time our country was founded, the literacy rate of the general populace was low. I personally, would like to vote on each issue and bill that came into vote instead of someone else voting for me. It is what it is.
What is your Favorite Color?
Blue. My favorite colors are blue, black, silver, and light pink (think Mary Kay).
Why do you have SO Many Unfinished Projects?
Simple— It is way easier to start a new project than to finish a project.
Finishing a project is work. It requires a lot of willpower, determination, and focus. You have to make yourself finish a project. It is such a relief off of your shoulders when you finish a project. It is much more rewarding than to start something new. You just have to force yourself to finish it.
Can you give me advice for (insert non drawing or writing related thing)?
The best advice I can give to anyone for anything is this:
It's your life. Being an adult comes with plenty of freedom, but with that freedom comes plenty of consequences. Make the decision on your own. I can't tell you what to do. Weigh your options and consider the best outcome for you. I can't tell you what that is. Just make sure you can live with the consequences of whatever you decide. Generally, you can't go back on decisions you make. Live life with no regrets. Just be sure that you can live with the consequences. Drinking (or anything really) too much will catch up to you eventually. There are decisions you can't go back on and you need to be aware of that. Be kind to yourself and be kind to other people. Make the best decisions for you. If you have no children, then the consequences are your own and it's okay to be selfish when you don't have any dependents. Take care of yourself and make your choices. Don't be afraid to make decisions, be afraid to not make any decisions. Weigh your options, make your decisions, and own up to your mistakes. You are only human. You will learn given time.
What is Your Sexuality?
Thank you for asking instead of assuming.
I am heterosexual and I consider myself mostly asexual.
I've been attracted to one girl in 31 years in a movie. However in real life, I've never felt attraction with another girl. I am pretty sure it was just because she was wearing leather. I remember someone saying in like seventh or eighth grade that there were girls looking at other girls in the locker room. I remember being so confused by it. So much so that someone actually had to spell it out to me that girls could be attracted to other girls.
I've been attracted to guys since I was 3. I had an obsession with Tommy from the Power Rangers when I was very little. I was in love with the character. I never even noticed that he had a thing for the pink ranger Kimberly.
I consider myself mostly asexual as I'm just not attracted to a lot of guys. It's under 1% of guys. I can think a guy is cute without feeling any kind of attraction. I've never been that girl that finds every guy she sees attractive. I've been friends with that girl and I know that girl very well. I am not her. When I find someone I'm actually into, I tend to be stuck on them for quite sometime as it is quite rare. I find myself envious of normal people at times. I'm just not normal.
Have you ever had to Turn Down a Guy? And How Did You Do That?
Yes, I have— way more than once. I've said at least over a hundred times, "We're not looking for the same thing." I can think of three strong examples outside of dating apps.
In my senior year in High School, I heard a guy and his friend talking to each other behind me about my butt. To make this clear, I really don't like dumb guys or being hit on. I really don't like compliments about my looks and prefer someone to get to know me first. If someone went up to me and said, "You're beautiful." All I can usually say is, "Thanks?" as I usually am not into them or even attracted to them. Looks are forever fleeting, so I don't care. I really rather be complimented about my brain, thoughts, or ideas as I continually choose brains over beauty outside of art. Again, looks are forever fleeting.
So this guy comes up to me and asks me to be his girlfriend. I have never seen this guy in my life. So, I just say "No." He said some things after that. It was 12 years ago, so my memories are vague. I just remember telling him "No" at least three times. I think I gave him some explanation of "I don't know you" or something.
For the second one, I was college. I was in like three classes with this one guy. I did not have feelings for him and I wasn't attracted to him. However, he was interesting to talk to. I was usually in a group with him and this other girl. We disagreed on everything. He made fun of me and of my tastes. He even made fun of my favorite band. Then at the end of our last class together, he asked me out— More than once. I told him "No" at least six times. I didn't give him an explanation. This guy picked on me for the entire time I knew him. I wasn't ever going to go out with him. We are still friends to this day, but he hasn't asked since and he's still an interesting guy.
The third one, was a little complicated. This guy was young. He was too young for me. He lived at home. I didn't know him very well because he didn't really talk to me. I didn't know him outside of work, so when he asked me for my number (which he should've already had as a sheet was passed out to all of us with everyone's number on it and I already had everyone's number in my phone) after he added me on Facebook, I didn't think anything of it. He wanted to chat on Snapchat. I had it downloaded, but didn't have anyone added or have ever used it before. My sister used it all the time, but she wouldn't add me. He had just left where we were working together and other people were asking about him, so I added him.
Basically he confessed. I told him I wasn't interested. Then the guy sent me a picture of his clothed junk. "It's PG-13," he said. Dude. I had just told him I wasn't interested. After speaking with him, I never really wanted to talk to him again. I basically told him, I was tired and went to bed to get him to stop talking to me. I didn't block him immediately because he knew where I worked and I didn't want him to show up there. The very next day, he messaged me when I was at lunch. He wanted to Snapchat again, which was never going to happen again. I sent him back a bunch of Pusheen cats. I went back to work and my phone goes off. He's calling me. I try texting him instead to tell him I'm working. Then he calls me again in the middle of me trying to text him back. I silent it and go back to trying to text him. Then he tries to FaceTime me. I blocked him— on EVERYTHING. I was transferring anyway. I told a couple other people, so just in case he came in I wouldn't have to deal with him.
Basically, say "No" and be upfront. There's no reason to deal with the last one.
When was your First Kiss?
I like to take things slow for good reasons. I write a lot about heartbreak, but if I had actually be involved with any of them, then it would've been way worse. The consequences from a heartbreak are more so if you move too fast, so I've been VERY careful— more than most people. I wouldn't be with anyone who wouldn't date me— on an actual date.
My first kiss was in July 2018 when I was 27 and I'm still with him.
Have you been raped?
Almost— 3 separate times at the ages of 3 or 4 (I was too young to remember the exact time, but it was before I started kindergarten), 9, and 15. Statistically, it is about 1 out of every 6 women. Personally, from talking to other women, I think this statistic is actually a lot higher. I didn't tell anyone until I was 16. I get this question because I have 3 sisters. I don't like talking about it and it stunted my development early on. It made me distrust guys, but I've also have a great relationship with my father and grandfather. It is probably the biggest reason why I am so cautious.
This is a difficult question and I ONLY put this on here to not hide. I did not partake in the "Me too" fad just because I still find it difficult to talk about. The person who did the worst of it died from a brain tumor, so there's no reason to think upon it any more. To talk about it, is to relive it and I don't want to remember.
I aim to help others to find that there is light after depression. There is light and beauty after heartbreak. Do not despair in this world's darkness. Overcome it and focus on the light. There is always something to live for and look forward to.
What is your Favorite Fact you've Learned?
Sadly, my favorite fact was something I learned when I was around 8 years old. It's sad as I wish I'd learned something much cooler than this, but alas... it was nice to know when I did.
You can choose what you remember if you replay it in your head over and over again. This was great when I was about 8 as I remember clearly things my sisters and my parent don't as I replayed all of my old memories when I was that age over and over again. However, this sucks as you will subconsciously replay traumatic memories over and over again. This is a survival mechanism, so those people who have significant trauma will remember it for the rest of their lives. This was nice to learn when I was so young as anything that happened that I did not understand or comprehend, I made myself remember. Eventually I was able to sort everything out as I grew older. To lessen trauma, you have to figure out how to stop from thinking about it and it will fade into nothingness, but don't ask me how to actually do that as I haven't been able to do that for myself.
If you're going to try it, then I recommend you only replay happy memories, so you have them forever.
You have two Emails. Which is Better?
I actually have more than just two emails: email@example.com, firstname.lastname@example.org, and email@example.com are just a few of my emails. All of them go to the same email box on my phone, so it doesn't matter.
What is Your Nickname?
Officially, I don't have a nickname. I am called "Princess" and "Cat" by my sisters. "Cat" was a personal joke from my sister Tina and "Princess" is the nickname my sisters gave me when they were jealous that I got more than they did (when in actuality I just asked for less and would go space out between asking for things. For an example, my sister wanted something at Hot Topic for $60 and I wanted something for $5. I would get mine, but she would not get hers).
Also — don't call me Andy. I just picture the nearly bald kid from the first "Toy Story" movie and no one else. I grew up with "Toy Story" as it came out in 1995 and I was 5 years old. Whereas, I did not watch "How to Lose A Guy in 10 Days" until I was like 26. I won't separate the two, so Andy or Andie is off limits. Andrea is fine.
Why Do You Still Work in a Field You Did Not Study?
Simple answer: Money.
I live in Indiana. Indianapolis is the sixteenth biggest city in the United States, but the Animation Industry is not here. The jobs that are available want experience I will not have for a long, long time or want free Interns. Basically, if I work for free, then I will go bankrupt. I won't be able to feed myself or pay for my phone bill or pay rent or anything including health insurance. If I took an internship and worked a job— they just don't intersect. All of the internships I have seen that I would be interested in, require 9-5 work days. I would have to work a separate job either second shift or third shift, but in the industry I work in— there are not many jobs to work late. I really just don't want to work two jobs. I rather work on my portfolio and finish college. I will be applying for well paid internships in late 2022, but those are highly competitive and I need an amazing portfolio to compete.