So— Life. It is full of ups and downs. There's so many things to do and people to see, but we have a limited amount of time on this Earth. The past ten years feel more like five. I'm terrible at time management, so what takes some people three years, takes me six. I finished Holiday Caticorn in 2020 and now in 2022, I am making a game with the Caticorn jumping through space. It is a class project, so it will be completed within three weeks. I have so many projects that sometimes the start date is nowhere near the end date.
Take my album for an example, I started it in 2013 and I finished it this year— in 2022. That's almost ten years! It makes me glad that I have something to show for it as most people never get to finish anything they start, so I feel very lucky and happy that I was able to. However, due to CDBaby's lack of replies to my emails, it is taking longer. If it is not fixed by June, then I will seek a different platform. Whatever works, as long as it works, is good enough for me.
So what have I been doing?
I've been working, doing homework, cooking, and focusing on my emotional health. I'm still torn up about my breakup back in December. I wish I could compartmentalize, but I've never been able to. So focusing on my emotional and mental health is my key to a happy life.
I've also been focusing on building my credit score up, so I can hopefully buy a house next year. I just realized that the student loans I have that I haven't been paying on— have been hurting my score due to the full balance versus the original balance taken out, so I'm going to have to fix that before I can get over 700. My score is 573 which sounds bad, but it is only due to high credit card debt and my student loans. I have a perfect payment history of over 500 payments, no delinquencies, like 32 total accounts, and I've taken out loans and paid them back on time or early. I just have to pay down some debt consistently and I'll have a good score by next year.
Yes— I've been cooking and I hate it. I wish I was satisfied with cold food, but I really love hot food. Cooking helps me stay within my budget, so I can pay down my debt. I've been making stir fry's mostly and rice. I just bought some organic wild rice which is supposed to be healthier than basmati rice, but I haven't tried it yet. The stir fry I've been making is just the stir fry frozen vegetables. I use different sauces for flavoring. Right now I have soy sauce, sweet chili sauce, and peanut sauce. I just bought the peanut sauce on Thursday so I haven't tried it yet. I am looking forward to it. I may look at adding in some tofu or fish in the future, but as I said— I don't like cooking. I just like eating, so I've been trying to find things I like that are healthier and easy to cook.
My ex used to buy all the groceries. I used to call it hunting for food because it was something he needed as we made the same amount of money and he felt like I didn't need him. I don't need anyone, but I prefer to not be alone. I can always find someone to keep me company as my family is big enough, but the lack of intimacy when I am on my own is terribly frustrating. Basically, I like cuddling and being close, but that is intensely lacking when I am single. I didn't plan on being single again, but it is what it is. I just have to take care of myself, improve my health, and buy a weighted blanket.