'My Deer'— Projects and their Meanings

I am taking Screenwriting this semester online and one of our first assignments was to create a one-minute movie with only still images and sound. Having a love for storyboards, I was naturally drawn to drawing all of my still images by hand. Here's the catch— I only had two days.

Coming up with ideas is a very simple task for me. I don't always go with the first thing that pops in my head. I do always go with an idea that won't go away. I have plenty of those ideas stored in the back of my mind ready to be created. There are ideas that are easily dismissed off hand, then there are ideas that just won't go away— even when you dismiss them. There are usually good reasons for it, but I never really know why until I complete the project and get a good look at it.

For Faeryland: The Defeat of the Troll King, there were a few things I noticed that stuck with me. First, the book is really about depression and how I pulled myself out of it and two I went to see my grandmother in the hospital and in hospice a few times. She was bored and listless like Alyssa. I think I write to think through things that happened in my own life. Even if I write a beautiful mystical story, there is always something real behind it. It is the same with My Deer.

With My Deer, I didn't really know until I was completely finished with the video process what it was about for me. My dad went hunting once and came back with two female does. He hung them in the garage and said he brought home "Bambi's mom". I was devastated. I think I was around 8 at the time. It did not sit well with me. That was my first thought when I completed the project.

Upon closer inspection, this project has other meanings for me. It definitely shows the anxiety about my projects. The doe represents me, the fawns represent my projects, and the hunter represents time. It can have a more literal interpretation of the fear of death or sexual undertones. It really is up to the viewer and the creator. Ultimately, each project is a piece of myself and they exist to understand who I am and my interpretation of the world.

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